It is Sunday evening and am thinking of work already!Why is the weekend so short?I hate road traffic on any day, traffic gives me that nauseous feeling: the exhaust fumes from the buses and the dust! On one of those typical work days, I boarded a bus at Obalende (not the bus in motion and the conductor SHOUTING for passengers) and on getting to my bus stop, I indicated the usual “owa o!” to alight. Alas, the conductor and the driver were shouting at me, “madam, oya, oya come down, you don reach your bus stop! (as thou I haven’t said that before, rolling my eyes). At that point, I noticed my neatly combed and straightened hair is now singing praises and not to forget the sweating episode b’cos of the sardine-in-a-tin like arrangement.
I tried imagining what it would be like boarding a bus and the conductor smiles at you and says “Good morning Madam, hope you enjoy your ride”. Huh! Are you kidding me?, in eko, that will be the day. I will so look forward to seeing that conductor every day!Instead it will be “abeg hold your change o! I no go reach last bus stop o” as if it is a crime dropping you at the last bus-stop.
To add to the whole craze, parts of the bus has fallen apart,even the bus itself is looking glued together! No seatbelt (for where!) and windows, the foams that are meant to be part of the chairs have gone AWOL, the seats have lost balance (it was that baaeed). It was so terrible that even when a passenger (that’s holding the somewhat balance) gets up, the rest of us can fall. As I said, we were all packed like sardines. Trust me that was my last option. I was feeling sticky and irritated. The person beside me was asleep and snoring, as if it was a do or die affair! I looked at the driver’s seat and no seatbelt (a loose rope was mimicking it), as if that will protect him from anything, mchewww!
I am 15 minuteslate already! Buses like this should not be out on the road anymore (hmmnn.. I dey talk as if say I dey london) You are supposed to be comfortable not miserable. (plenty grammar) Well, I thank God for safe journey! Just then, I see a lady alighting from a private RIDE (if you see the machine ehn!) and I envision myself being dropped of like that everyday . Hmmm! back to the present, as I trod towards the estate gate am imagining better roads, buses fit for the road, drivers n conductors having better interpersonal relations, I wonder how the oyinbos are accomplishing unimaginable to conceivable feats (I hope not when am a grandma) Eko o ni baje!
eventually, I arrive at the office and a colleague of mine is pointing at the back of my well starched and ironed shirt. lo n behold, an u-no-know-how-to-hide-am oil stain is there obviously smiling to everybody. Oh my God! i imagined all the well calculated sisi steps I have taken since alighting, haba! “which kind bus I enter today sef”?
